Department Stores Mean Christmas to Me
Lyrics by David Cameron Anderson, Davecamson Music ASCAP
Music by Steven Landau, Stevepno Music ASCAP

I never knew a Christmas in the country
Placed my gifts beneath a piece-together tree
Chestnuts roast and turn to charcoal while I'm shopping
Department stores mean Christmas to me

The season gets its start in late October
Plastic wreaths keep plastic pumpkins company
With less than 62 more shopping days 'till Christmas
Department stores mean Christmas to me!

I often dream I spend Thanksgiving Day at Macy's
On a float next to a star from the TV
Post parade I hand out candy canes with Santa
Ask his reindeer to explain their games to me

Where I'm from Santa's house sits next to Penney's
There's a line to sit on Santa's Helper's knee
When it's my turn and I whisper, "how's your Christmas?"
He says, "Department stores mean Christmas to me!"

Now, of course, I've not forgotten 'bout the baby
Who was visited that night by wise men three
But they had to get that Frankinscense from somewhere!
A last minute, late night, star-lit shopping spree!

To catch the Christmas spirit I don't need the snow to fall
I am dreaming of a white sale at my local shopping mall!

Tradition finds me making merry at Sears Roebuck
Christmas muzak sets the mood so perfectly
You'll forgive me if I'm waxing sentimental
Department stores mean Christmas
Department stores mean Christmas

Hark how the bells, sweet silver bells, all seem to say, throw CASH our way! OKAY!

Department stores mean Christmas to me!